A Declaration of Independence for You

Here  in  the  United  States  of  America,  it  is  Independence  Day.  On  this  same  day,  I  have  made  a  Declaration  of  Independence…  for  You.  I  declare  Your  independence  from  sadness,  stupidity,  worthless  people  and  lack  of  fun  and  happiness.  May  You  all  have  a  great  day.

Punxsutawney Jill for Groundhog Day 2018

Hello Everybody.  I am Punxsutawney Jill, the wife of Punxsutawney Phil.  Today is Groundhog Day.  It is a day named after the Groundhog.  Since I am a groundhog, I am qualified to speak to you.  If I were not a groundhog, I would not have been able to speak to you.  As you know, Phil is supposed to go outside and see if he can see his shadow.  However, if it is too cold outside, we will be staying in to keep warm.  If you are looking for winter to end quickly, do not count on us.  We have no control over the weather.  Therefore, stay warm.  We will come out when the weather gets warmer.  In the meantime, I am Punxsutawney Jill.  Have a HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY!!!

Happy New Year to All of YOU!!!

Hello  Everyone.  2017  is  coming  to  an  end,  and  2018  will  begin.  I  have  posted  many  things.  This  post  is  a  tribute  to  all  of  YOU,  my  readers.  YOU  are  some  of  the  most  amazing  people  in  History.  We  have  Neha,  Anisa  Kazemi,  Jonathan  Caswell,  G.P.  Cox,  Deborah  Ann  Belka,  Tosha  Michelle,  Michelle  Marie,  Cynthia  Morgan,  Inese  Photo,  MiddleMe,  Penny  Vanderbilt,  Christy  Birmingham,  Shehanne  Moore,  Gastradamus,  Evelina,  Miss  Talkaholic,  Human  Rights  Lawyer,  Tetiana,  Lucas  Palhao,  L.T.  Garvin,  WitlessDatingafterfifty,  Lemanshots,  The  Little  Mermaid,  Vonita,  Beautybeyondbones,  Theologyarchaology,  Semila,  the  lovely  Holly  of  House  of  Heart,  plus  many  of  you  whose  names  I  do  not  remember.  I  wish  all  of  you  a  very  Happy  New  Year  and  a  blessed  2018.

On That Very Night Before Christmas

It was Christmas Eve.

I was sitting at the table in my pajamas and bear slippers looking at an old magazine.

“I’m home,” said Darla as came through the front door with two huge shopping bags.

“Did you get everything?”

She set the bags down.  “I got much more.”  She walked to the fireplace where the fire was crackling.  “It took me a while to check out.”  She took off her boots.  “The lines were very long.”  She took her socks off and hung them over the fireplace.

“You have to expect that on Christmas Eve.”  I kept looking at the magazine.

“You know how it is.”  She sat down at the table and took off her coat.  “Everyone needs that last minute gift.”  She put her bare feet on the table and took off her hat.

“So what are we leaving Santa tonight?”  I asked.

“I really don’t know.”  She glanced at the tree in the living room.  “I thought about pizza.  I figured everyone always leaves him cookies and milk.  It would be nice to have a real meal for once.”

“Pizza it will be.  We may have some cookies and milk for desert.”

It was Christmas.

I walked into the living room wearing my pajamas and bear slippers to see what Santa had brought us.  As expected, there were presents under the tree.  I peeked at the pizza box and to see that he ate the whole thing, and he ate the cookies and drank the milk.  I saw a note on the empty plate with a few crumbs.  I picked it up.

“Thank you for the pizza.  It was very good.  For this reason, I gave you and Darla extra presents under the tree.  Oh, I did need to use your bathroom, and it required me to use so much of your toilet paper.  Now you are fully stocked.”

“What did he saw?”  Darla snuck up behind me in her pajamas… and she felt something on her toe.  She looked down and saw her big toe covered in tomato sauce.

I continued reading.  “Oh, I did drop a little sauce onto the floor.  I hope you have a very Merry Christmas.  P.S.  You will get more goodies next year.”

She looked at her toe covered in tomato sauce.

“Should we do fried chicken next year?”  I said.

She snatched a napkin from the table and bent over to wipe the sauce from her toe.

“Let’s just see what we got.”

From there, we opened our presents.

Happy Holly Daze

It was a bright sunny day in late December.  I was sitting on a bench reading a book glancing up from time to time to see what was going on around me.  I was looking down at my book, and a strange feeling came upon me.  I peeked and saw a beautiful red haired woman with a bright smile sitting next to me.  Her hair flowed from beneath her Santa hat onto the shoulders of her red sweater with lights that lit up on and off.  She wore black leggings that went halfway down her calf, and she was barefoot with some mistletoe tied to her right big toe.

“Hello.”  I smiled at her.

“Merry Christmas!”  She smiled with a twitch in her face.  “It is so nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” I said.  “You are very Christmassy today.”

“Thank you.”  She stretched her bare feet across my lap.  “I am Holly Daze.”

“Holly Daze?”  I thought it was a cute name for a cute lady.  “I like your name.”

“Thank you,” she had a gleeful joy about her.  “When I am happy, you can call me Happy Holly Daze.”

“What a very cute name.”  I grinned.  “I hope that you can get something good for Christmas.”

Another woman with bright red hair came to the bench wearing a red shirt, green leggings with red socks and black flat shoes, and she sat opposite of where Holly was seated.

“Oh,” Holly blurted as she was rubbing her foot across my lap, “this is Carol Ling.”

Carol gave me a kiss on my cheek.

“Now I see Christmas Carol Ling.  You are not going to sing, are you?”  I thought that I should ask the question.

“Nope,” said Carol.  “I will give you something instead.”

She peeled off her right sock and handed it to me.  “Whatever you pull out of my sock is yours.”

I hesitated, but then I reached in, and I pulled out a set of car keys.

“The Range Rover is right over there.”  She pointed to a white Range Rover park in a nearby parking space.

“Thank you,” I said to her.

She kissed me again.  “You are very welcome.”  She put her sock back on.  “I hope that you enjoy it.”

“Would you both like a ride?”  I shook the keys.

They looked at each other.

We got into the Range Rover.  Carol sat in the back seat.  Holly sat in the passenger seat and put her feet on the dashboard.  As we went off, I was enjoying my Happy Holly Daze and Christmas Carol Ling.